The Womanly Heartaches of Bleeding, Infertility, and Miscarriages

Infertility

I've written about the womanly art of bleeding. But what often goes in silence are the pains and heartaches many women experience on a regular basis as their bodies cycle through their periods. The swelling and the cramping, worsened for many by fibroids and uterine thickening, and the emotional effects of the hormone shifts.

And then there's the bleeding women don't want to see when it becomes a message of infertility or the dramatic experience of miscarriage.

Unbeknownst to the public, Anna Arrowsmith, also known as feminist pornographer Anna Span, has endured much of all of this over the years. Suffering on a regular basis from intense period pains and prolonged bleeding as a result of adenomyosis (endometriosis interna), she has over the last three years also gone through the added exaggerated effects of hormone treatments and IVF with its high hopes and wrenching losses. Four IVF cycles, four pregnancies, four successfully detected heartbeats, then no more.

And nobody knew. When Anna was actively campaigning last year as a Liberal Democrat Candidate for Gravesham in Kent, advocating for comprehensive human sexuality education among other issues, nobody knew all that she was suffering off the political scene.

Then after a dramatic conclusion to the fourth pregnancy this fall followed by near fatal illness due to treatments she'd received to keep the pregnancy going (by suppressing her immune system), Anna's husband Tim Arrowsmith last month finally posted about their experiences and they both shared his post on Twitter. 

As Anna commented in her tweet sharing Tim's post, the topic of infertility is still a bit taboo. For that reason, the couple sharing their experiences with it is all the more significant. As Tim writes, his hope is that "some of this may resonate with some of you who have had similar experiences and might promote a bit more open discussion of a taboo subject, even amongst friends."

Busted! Gender Myths in the Bedroom & Beyond | Live Science {featured read}

The difference in men's and women's attitudes toward sex are often taken for granted. Men want sex, women want commitment; men look for attractive mates and women go after social status.

But not all psychologists are on board with these gender-essentialist statements.

In a new review, University of Michigan psychologist Terri Conley and colleagues sift through psychology studies and find gender differences aren't always as black-and-white (or pink-and-blue) as they seem. Here are six gender differences that may not be innate after all.
Read More at Live Science >>

No Bikini {featured video}

A young girl aged seven defies gender roles with inspiring results when she decides not to wear a top during a summer swim camp. Directed by Claudia Morgado Escanilla.

Faking It | Smitten Kitten {featured read}

A word to everyone, everywhere: let’s make a concentrated effort to make fake orgasms a thing of the past.

Allow me to make an observation: women in general don’t seem to be completely sexually satisfied with their partners. That’s right, I said most women. Feminist women, adventurous women, dominant women, women who have casual sex, even women who know their partner is good in bed, and all of their counterparts. Orgasm fakery is an equal-opportunity phenomenon. If it makes you angry or uncomfortable to hear it, it should. Women are capable of having orgasms, and I think we can all pretty much agree that women SHOULD be having them.
Read More at Smitten Kitten >>